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5/25/2022 0 Comments

What Do All Those Letters Mean? A Beginner's Guide to the Acronymn

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The term LGBTQ+ is an acronym. This quick guide for beginners breaks down each letter and what they signify. Sometimes, you may find a "+" after the acronym since the community is not just exclusive to only those who are LGBTQ, but includes other gender and sexual minorities as well. 

L

L refers to those who are lesbian. A lesbian refers to a woman who is solely attracted to other women. There are lesbians who prefer butch females which are more masculine ladies, and there are Lesbians who prefer femme females which are more feminine women. Regardless of their preference, if a women is only attracted to women they would consider themselves to be a lesbian.

G

G refers to those who are gay. A gay person is someone who is attracted to only people of their same gender. Gay is commonly used with males who are attracted to other males, though some lesbians may also refer to themselves as gay. A gay couple refers two men in a relationship.

B

B refers to those who are bisexual. Someone who is bisexual is an individual who is attracted to both males and females regardless of their own gender. Some bisexual people are attracted to both genders on different levels but that does not make them any less bisexual. Bisexuality is not just a 50/50 split in most cases, which is a common misconception of bisexual people.

T

T refers to those who are transgender. Unlike the previous letters, this one does not refer to sexuality. A transgender person has a different gender identity from what they were assigned as at birth. Many transgender people have what is called gender dysphoria where one feels distress if their gender does not match the one they were assigned at birth. 

Q

Q stands for those who are queer or questioning. Queer is a hypernym term describing any person who is not cisgender and straight. A questioning individual is someone who is questioning either their gender identity or their sexuality. Questioning people may not use specific terms like bisexual or transgender because they are not sure yet.

+

The + at the end of LGBTQ+ refers to many other sexualities and gender identities as well. There are other sexualities like asexual and pansexual. Additionally, there are other gender identities such as non-binary. Those in the LGBTQ+ community often pride themselves for being inclusive and loving of all--there's room for everyone under the rainbow. 
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10/8/2021 2 Comments

Don't Know Anyone Who is LGBTQ+? Think Again.

by Tres Adames
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​Whenever I teach about LGBTQ+ issues in faith communities, one comment I hear from time to time is: "We don't have anyone who is gay who goes to this church," or "I don't know anyone who is trans." I am quick to correct this assertion. 
​According to researchers at Columbia University, the average person knows about 600 people. Based on a Gallup poll in 2021: "Gallup's latest update on lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender identification finds 5.6% of U.S. adults identifying as LGBT. The current estimate is up from 4.5% in Gallup's previous update based on 2017 data." This means that roughly 1 in 20 Americans identify as LGBTQ+. By looking at these figures, it's apparent that the average individual personally knows numerous people who are LGBTQ+. Now, the exact number will vary based on several factors, but the point is clear: you know several people who are members of the LGBTQ+ community. Some of them may not be fully out, some may be completely closeted, others may be celibate or repressing their sexuality, and some may even be in mixed-orientation marriages.

1 in 20 Americans identify as LGBTQ+

The average individual personally knows several people who are LGBTQ+.

Roughly using these figures, it's easy to see how a small church of 200 may actually have several members who are LGBTQ+. Even an extended family of 30-50 people may very well have one or a few LGBTQ+ family members. 

​Why is this important? Because we need to be sensitive about how we talk about the LGBTQ+ community in the churches we attend, the places we work, and the people we live with.
I have sat in many Sunday School classes and church meetings where the LGBTQ+ community was spoken about so disparagingly that it made me physically sick to my stomach. Even during the days when I was trying to repress my sexuality, it was hurtful to hear about the community when it was spoken about with so much contempt. It was these conversations that kept me closeted for years.
"The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit." —Proverbs 15:4, NIV
Even if you are Christian who believes that being LGBTQ+ is somehow wrong, I would hope that as a believer in Christ, you would choose words of kindness over speech that can be deeply hurtful and traumatizing to those who converse with you — you never know who you are taking to or what they are going through.

Mary Griffith was an LGBTQ+ ally and advocate who wrote a book called Prayers for Bobby, which is a memoir about how she lost her son to suicide. She was not accepting of him while he was alive and only after he died did she realize the effect her words had on her son. She wrote: 

​“Before you echo 'Amen' in your home or place of worship, think and remember...a child is listening."— Mary Griffith

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